03/19/04: intersections

It's been a very strange week.

I started my new job working from home this week, and I'm not really sure what to make of it. I think I'm going through some human interaction withdrawal, which is rather funny considering I was always bellyaching previously about how people wouldn't leave me alone. :-)

Matt-o-blatt was telling me how at his job, he sits in an office all day with nobody to talk to, so when he gets home from work he wants to be social. His wife Carol has the opposite thang-- she works with a zillion people all day and when she gets home she just wants to curl up. I can now perfectly see both sides!

My new job is actually kind of interesting, and I honestly feel like I'm doing some good. It's a strange sensation considering how I was feeling like a totally inefficient frustrated buttwad drowning in piles and piles of pointless tasks and processes in my previous position. I'm not sure how long this little project is going to last, so the honeymoon may be rather short; but I'm enjoying it so far. Ideally, I'd be able to stretch this sucker out until the end of the summer because I can work from anywhere with an internet connection.

In fact, if I really had my druthers (what is a druther?), this would be my life for the next few months:

Not too ambitious, right?

In other news... not that I'm particularly religious, but more as an exercise of will, I decided to give up swearing for Lent. I am a failure and will burn in Hell for all eternity.   The second night of Lent we went bowling, and I think I dropped the f-bomb about 867 times. (I'm not a very good bowler.)   I think this little trial has shown me that I really am a horrible potty-mouth, that cursing is really just a substitute for a less-than-creative vocabulary, and that yes, there really are situations that genuinely call for bad words. (Just ask Keith!)

I have a friend Keith who once confided in me that he's only said one bad word in his whole life... he said "the F word" when he was 9 or 10, and still to this day feels guilty about it. A few months ago though, he was being tailgated by a dangerously aggressive driver, and Keith stopped the car just so the guy would go around him... but instead the guy got out of his car and stared our hero down. Keith said, "I don't know what came over me, but I just looked at this guy and yelled, 'What the FSCK is your problem!?!!?'" [spelling changed to trick the net-nanny]   So this makes me feel OK about occasionally cursing. If it's good enough for a Jehovah's Witness, it's good enough for me, man.

Speaking of Keith, I'm trying desperately to hook him up with Georgie Staley; I really think they'd be wonderful together. Deliciously warped, genuinely good and kind, same sense of timing... Why is it that when my love life is so ridiculous that I find it necessary to play yente?

Anyway, Doctah Rob was in Philly all this week for a big geography conference; as you know, Philly is just 20 minutes up the road here. As you may also know, Christurner works in Philly. As you may not know, Brianturner was in Philly the other day interviewing for a job, so the Turner boys had some lunch together. So while they're in some lunch place, this red-bearded map guy catches the eye of this striking Asian guy, and they both start feverishly doing the math trying to figure out how they know each other. I'm not sure who clicked first, but Rob went up to the guys and said, "Are you the Turners?" and the next thing you know, introductions were made all around. The only thing I know is that I get an email from Christurner that said, "Guess who I ran into at lunch?" at the same my phone rang with Rob asking me if I had heard anything from anyone about a lunchtime introduction. Very, very, VERY surreal. All sources report that Chris handled it like a pro, Rob was sincere and polite and Brian just smiled and didn't really know what was going on. In my alternate universe, then Mark would have sauntered into the restaurant along with Brett and YahooRob and they all would have shared some lemon cake and almond horchata. What the hell, throw Pete in there too-- he could bring some Malaysian food.

This morning at 10:00am was my first conference call for my new job, so I had to make sure I was totally prepared and on time. However, Rob and I made plans to go out for breakfast as he drove down to BWI to catch his lunchtime flight. So I talked my boss last night and told him that I had the carpet guy coming (you know, to my apartment...?) and I would definitely be on the call at 10, but not to expect too much of me for the 2 hours prior. He was cool with it. So the good doctor (er, rather, the carpet guy) got to my place around 9-ish and we feasted on my world-famous pumpkin bread (which is merely a vessel to eat the pumpkin icing I make along with it) and had a nice little visit.

I would just like the record to state that I am so relieved that we can be friends and not all screwy stupid. I mean, I was never afraid of him being screwy-stupid (he is the dumper, after all), but I just didn't think I'd be able to get over this any time soon and that I'd be a complete basketcase with my saggy-ass broken heart flopping all over the place. Not true. While we were sitting at my kitchen table, I did get this weird feeling, like outside of myself. I tried so hard to really tune in and experience what I was feeling... was I happy he was there? Was I feigning joviality? Was I completely heartbroken that I wasn't gonna get a smooch goodbye? And the truth is, I have no idea. I didn't really feel much of anything. My dad could have been sitting there, or Steven Page could have been sitting there. As Mark says, I was on "this side of the click" and just was the null set. Not in a bad way at all, just in a, "Hey look, there's Rob." Not in a "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh there's Rob, and he's lost that lovin' feelin'" and not "there's Rob and he's a stupid idiot who has no idea what he lost" and not in any kind of anything. Just null.

And I'm good with that. I think null is a good place to be. I think it's reasonable and acceptable to be null. I'm not pining necessarily, I'm not dying, my ant-man wasn't trying to throw out a tether. I was OK.

I am OK.

I'm good enough, and smart enough, and goshdarnit, people like me!

What else can I add here...

Someday I should learn that when I find myself typing "what else can I add here" that I should add nothing and just shut up already.

But not today! No sirreeee! Aren't you lucky!

Jeremy was in Las Vegas all week for a training class of some kind. While we were on the plane going to AZ last week, we saw an advertisement for a new 4-D Star Trek/Borg ride/experience thing at the Las Vegas Hilton that was going to be opening up this week. Because he writes for some nutty Windows-related magazine (I can't keep them all straight), he convinced some guy that he was a member of the press. So he got to be one of the first people on the planet to see this thing so he could, ya know, "write about it." He got to meet the creators and designers, as well as Robert Picardo (The Doctor from Voyager) and Jason Frikkin' Alexander. Dude! How cool is that? So Jeremy is completely beside himself that he gets to say hello to these people, when he gets a tap on his shoulder from some coordinator person who says, "Mr. Moskowitz, right this way. Looks like you're the only one left who hasn't yet interviewed Jason Alexander. Would you please walk this way to the The Bridge?" So picture Moskowitz and Jason Alexander sitting on the frikkin' bridge of the Enterprise, and Jeremy having to invent questions for "his magazine." Haha! Jerm said he asked him mostly questions about acting (you know, just what the readers of Windows Magazine want to know about). How cool is that?!

This reminds me of the time my friend Eric borrowed our DAT equipment to bootleg a Philip Glass concert in Arizona. When Eric got busted, he just told them that he was with NPR and had the equipment to record an interview he was scheduled to have later with Philip. So ya know what? After the show, they ushered Eric The Important NPR Correspondent in, and he interviewed him! How cool is that?!

(And here's where Matt would say, "Yeah, but my dog is licking the floor.")

Speaking of Matt, he's got yet another play opening Off-Broadway tonight; I believe this one is A Curtain Call to Arms. He is so talented I could throw up. Excuse me while I go take care of that.

Still speaking of Matt, he's playing a 15-minute set at Knappuccino's tomorrow night. You should show up!
Come on, it'll be fun!
Oh, stop it, you can do that some other night.