04-03-05: zing!

For the last few months the processor cooling fan in my comput0r (whom I call Maude) has been getting louder and louder. A few weeks ago it had reached leaf-blower status, so I yanked the F-er out in a fit of arrrrrgh and figured my mental health was worth risking burning out my processor.

This led me to a new and strange concept in my life: only turning my computer on when I needed it for something, as opposed to having it run all the time. Having it run all the time makes it oh-so-easy to jump online, but it makes it oh-so-hard to jump off. I'd find myself staying up until 80-million-o'clock reading LJ and Fark and the other phun sites people send my way, and I'd find myself getting next to no sleep. Having limited comput0r access made my life a bit better. I got my 8-hours of shut-eye, I was more chipper, the LJ community was not bogged down with the mundane minutia of my day. Having very limited internet access at work (I have a weird affliction called "work ethic," which prevents me from spending too much time reading/responding to personal email), I found that my online interaction had dwindled significantly. On Friday night I felt so cool and popular and rockin'... I went to CompUSA and bought a 250GB hard drive and a processor cooling fan. That's me, living the hott sexxee life of a hott sexxee 33-year-old redhead. I got 'em all installed Friday night, and Maude is very happy camper. She zings!

In other news... things in Ninja-land are pretty neat. We just got past the one-year mark, which is a good feeling. I wasn't going to see him for a whole month due to some scheduling conflicts, but at the last minute my awesome peepz told me I could get out of every possible Easter-related obligation I had guilt-free, so John worked his ninja-magic and managed to get me out there. Wheeee!

Speaking of the ninja, he's in Austin right now scoping out job opportunities, doing some general recon and hanging with friends. I am cheering him on. We're not sure exactly what he's gonna find out there, but I'm hoping it's a heaping batch of whatever it is he needs. Sometimes you need to see your options before you can decide what you're even looking for. (At least that's what I say to myself every time I walk into a Trader Joe's or by a produce stand.)

What else...

I went to the movies yesterday (Saturday) with Joe, Paula and Lee-- we went to see Sin City. The movie was meh, but very pretty to look at. I think if I were more of a fan of the Sin City comics I'd be more into it. Every time I see Bruce Willis I can't help but think how he was expelled from my college being told he was a no-talent doofus, and now he's got an honorary degree from there.

Before the movies, I got a massage by some dude who walked on my back. I was afraid his feet would be skanky, but I guess if you're in the massage-with-your-feet bizniss, then you take care of yer dogz. It was very weird. When I go for a massage, I 50% go because my muscles are sore and I feel a little out of whack, and I 50% go because it just feels nice to have that human energy-exchange in a safe, relaxing environment with 18% cheezoid Native American or Pan-Asian music playing in the background, wicker furniture and aromatherapy oils assaulting your senses. But this guy was not interested in making me relax and feel peaceful... there was nothing "flooofie" about him. He should have had Led Zep playing cranked on 11 instead of the tinkly music they had. The dude was a total buff beefcake, not the typical masseur physique at all. He had the tableside manner of a fratboy. This was not relaxing. This was ass-kicking. He had no concept of energy work or body communication... this was "I am going to pound your puny frame into a pulp with my hulking manly (but strangely soft) feet." So, in a way, I feel like I got way more for my money than I originally wanted, and in another way, I still feel like I just want a hug. :-)

To make my life interesting, six hours after my massage... zing: my back went out. Great.

Anyway, I was supposed to go see Moon Over Buffalo at the Drama League with Georgie, Tina and a bunch of other folks, but since I can't walk or sit up straight, I decided to gracefully decline.

Today (Sunday) I didn't have choir (not exactly sure why, but that's ok since I couldn't walk easily.. cue violins), so I slept until (zoinks) 1:30pm (thanks, Endocet!), stretched a lot, drank some coffee and watched old videos of The Tick cartoons thanks to Jerm. Joe was supposed to swing by and keep me company tonight but something came up... probably for the better, since I'm not in any condition to play hostess.

In other news... Brian Turner got married this weekend to his awesome babe Katie in San Diego. The whole Turner clan is out west, along with key Wilmington personnel. I hope Chrizzle is holding up OK; I know this wasn't going to be the easiest thing for him. I'm glad he'll have good friends there.

It wouldn't be a llij.net post if there wasn't the requisite introspection, so here it is for this month:
I have some fleeting images of what I envision my "grown up" life to be, and I've had these visions since I was a young'un. I picture myself teaching voice in a sunny room with big windows, a succulent plant of some kind and an upright piano; there are stacks of music everywhere. I picture myself singing a lot. I envision myself part of a group of people on padded folding chairs singing two-on-a-part early music without having to have their parts banged out too often. I picture myself in an black evening gown schmoozing with businesspeople at a dinner party at hotel, and making someone very proud from across the room. I picture myself doing a very occasional play and having my talents respected. I pet my neighbor's dog. I picture myself going on a cruise and eating mangoes. I picture myself taking many more roadtrips with an excellent soundtrack. I picture myself cooking dinner in a clean kitchen with yellow walls; I picture myself kissing my husband hello when he walks in the door. I picture myself being in several short films. I envision laughing a lot, and being surrounded by creative, honest people. I envision being generally regarded as the "more normal, stable one" out of my group of quirky artsy friends, but they don't hold it against me-- they like me for it.

I don't know when these things are going to start happening. Some already have, and some are in progress.

What was I doing this time last year? Let's see.

Fortune Teller Miracle Fish today tells me that I am: A dead one.   Cold hands (but a warm heart.) :-)