05/12/04: work it, baby

9:47am: Yesterday afternoon I jumped a train from Princeton Junction and made my way to NYC to see De La Guarda with John for his birthday. Transitwise, everything went smoothly, except for me having to park in Guam and thusly miss my train... luckily that didn't prove to be much of a problem. There was a pigeon inside the NYPenn train station and it seemed to be only slightly confused. It brought me joy, though I did want to pick him up and bring him outside... but mostly because I just wanted to pick up a bird (rat of the bird world or not).

Anyway, grabbing a cab was a snap, we picked up John at his hotel around 6:45 or so, got down to the village at 7, was done with dinner by 7:45 and we ambled across the street and found our spot in the theater.

The show rocked the house -- it was my second time seeing it -- and John dug the heck out of it; I knew it would be up his alley. Highlight of the show: they flew me. I couldn't believe it... I was just standing there and the next thing I know some nekkid hot asian dude is strapping me in and giving me smooches and some other guy is making sure my shoes aren't the fling-off kind, and whoosh... away I went. It was amazing! There's not the teeniest amount of "ohmygodI'mgonnabarf" when they fly you-- it's very graceful -- I can only equate it to parasailing, that is, if parasailing had you whipping around a bit more. None of that stomach-dropping stuff. Totally, totally, totally amazing and exhilerating-- what a cool job these actors have.

I also learned that a vodka & Red Bull is made much more palatable if you simultaneously chomp on a piece of Lemon Ice Eclipse gum.

After the show, I debated coming back to DE right away. I was really tired (didn't sleep well the night before), I was achy, I was wearing particularly annoying socks which made every step like walking on brillo, and after the up-up-and-amazing show I was just kind of physically/emotionally spent-- so all of these factors together just rendered me quiet. Nothing was wrong, I wasn't sad or unhappy... just in quiet observation and listening mode. I could feel myself totally being the turd in the punchbowl and ruining this really good (figurative) buzz we had going on, and I was afraid John was thinking I was wigging out over something relating to him, which absolutely wasn't the case. Anyway, we got to the hotel and I weighed my options as to staying or going. As much as I wanted to sleep like a log in my own bed, I also didn't relish the thought of driving an hour+15 back to DE from Princeton after the train ride, nor did I look forward to walking to the bowels of the train station parking lot by myself at midnight. So I did the smart thing and crashed in NYC. John and I talked for a while and it was really cool to connect with him like that. I mean, we connect on the goofball level, and we connect on the geeky level and on the general human/global responsibility levels, but this was a level I never really knew his opinions on. So it was just kinda cool to learn, which of course makes me want to ask 1,000 more questions.     It's so weird. Because he's leaving so soon, I find myself not sharing / asking stuff... not because I'm uninterested, but because of the "what's the point?" factor. Guh, this is indeed a very weird situation-- I've never dated anyone with an expiration date. :-D   But hey, if it doesn't kill you it makes you smarter and stronger, so I'll just chalk it up to life experience, I suppose.

In the morning, I left the hotel at 6:25am or so, got to Penn Station at 6:35, grabbed a bagel sammich and got all excited when I saw a NJ Transit ticket purchase terminal wanting to run chkdsk. I jumped the 6:55am train out of NYPenn to Princeton Junction and was home by 9:30 after having stopped at the bank, too. There was only one call in the queue placed there only moments before, so once again, no work-harm done in me slacking.

In other news entirely, in addition to my salsa addiction, pine nuts and steamed carrots (not together) have made their way onto my list. I find myself craving pine nuts by the handful. That can't be healthy... I mean, at least salsa and carrots are good for you.

1:37pm: Holy crap, I need a massage. My neck and shoulders are so out of whack, it's unfathomable. Hmmm... I do have a massage gift certificate laying around here somewhere... now if only I could find the time to use it.

Yesterday I learned a little bit about savings bonds. My grandparents had bought me a bunch of savings bonds back in 1978. I've bought savings bonds for friends' kids and such, and I always thought the drill was: if the bond says $50 on the face of it, you pay the bank $25 and on the maturation date the bond is worth the face value. Makes sense. So I have a bunch of these laying around so I went to the bank yesterday to cash out two of them; one was a $25 bond, and the other was $50. So I'm expecting $75 which was gonna be a fun grandparental treat for an NYC birthday dinnah for John. I was all excited to look at these bonds-- they're in a cute 70s font envelope with my grandfather's handwriting and my 6-year-old scrawl as well... very cute. Anyway, so the bank lady takes the bonds and does her magical whamma jamma, and she says of the $25 bond, "OK, so this one is worth 94 dollars. And this other one is worth about $240. Will that be OK?" So I'm like, "Pbbsht, I guess so."   :-D

(Note to Mom if you're reading this: No, I am not broke. No, I am not so poor that I need to be cashing out my savings bonds. I just thought it would be cool. Stop worrying.)

Anyway, I called this entry "work it" for a reason, and I'll be damned if I can remember why now. I know I had some point to make, but it has currently left the building.

Speaking of work (which isn't the reason for naming this "work it"), I'm still very conflicted about the job situation... no progress as to a decision. Like I've said before, I'm not getting excited until I see an offer letter-- I want to make sure the job that was verbally offered and sounded so tasty good is do-able according to HR. I am not going to get roped into quasi-permanance on a verbal agreement; I need concrete! Jim made a very good point the other day in a comment to my 5/5/04 "weight of options" post... he said, "dude, $25k is a lot of salsa. go back, continue to live on your current salary, sticking the money in the bank/house/investment until you have enough to retire and teach music/voice." There certainly is plenty of wisdom in that. I could work the job for a year, take the differential and bank it and re-evaluate my options then. I mean, in a year maybe I'll be looking to move.

Last night while I was talking to John I realized (though much of it was my indecisive mood) that I was saying "I don't know" a lot to biggish questions. This must make me look/sound wishy-washy. I think wishy-washiness is all a matter of perspective.   You may be wondering what my .plan is... and in a nutshell, I don't have some grand life plan, like, "Be married in 2 years, have two kids in 4 years, own a house within driving distance of a body of water, teach music out of my home and live happily ever after." That's too specific. My life plan is, "Don't bounce checks, be cool to people, recycle, try to improve the world in my own small but deliberate and consistent way, be creative, be inspired, hopefully inspire others, feed some birds and eat lots of salsa." And frankly, I've been executing this life plan quite successfully for about 10 years now.

OK, I've gotta go to choir rehearsal.

Little Shop closes this weekend, folks-- so if you haven't caught it, you've only got Thursday night, Friday night and two performances on Saturday to see us in hot man-on-plant action.

Fortune Teller Miracle Fish today tells me that I am: Passionately False... or Falsely Passionate-- you decide. (We had a fish that curled up entirely and then flipped over.   Not sure how to interpret that one, yo.