08/26/04: ox bile + snake

My fellow Americans:

If you have ever mooched off of my Magic Altoids Tin, you don't need to anymore. Trader Joe's Digestive Formula (featuring ox bile!) is the greatest stuff ever, and that sentiment is not the object of gross exaggeration. This shizzle is the dizzle, bizzle.

Ponk free. Gurgle free. Bloaty belly free. Bionic arse unnecessary.


Go buy this NOW. I'm telling you, your life will change. Take one caplet with everything you eat.

NOTE: This stuff isn't a remedy, meaning, if you forget to take it, taking it after you eat won't do anything. The trick is to have it mixing with what you are eating when you're eating it. So, once you've got the ponks, this can't save you.

Aren't you glad we can all talk so freely about innards?

Anyhoo. In other news...

Last night John and I made significant headway into our RV decorating project for Burning Man. We're building a huge spider web out of EL wire, but instead of putting a spider in it, we're putting a giant stuffed snake for no other reason than we think it's funny.

John's got these big windows that look out on his backyard, and one window that looks out onto his fire escape. This fire escape is a local hangout for plump pigeons, and there's this one pigeon that sits in this one spot and the window frames him perfectly. I just about pee myself when this bird sits there.   John, however, isn't as fond of the birds (well, more specifically, what the birds leave behind), so he knocks at the window when he sees a gang out there. The birds flutter away but are back in 2 seconds. But last night John shook this giant stuffed snake at them and I swear, you could smell the fear. The image of a mid-30s doctor shaking a stuffed furry snake at pigeons on a fire escape was possibly even funnier than watching a mid-30s doctor chasing a squirrel around my apartment with a red plastic shovel. I laughed so hard I got a charley horse in my ab muscle. Ha ha ow ow ha ha ow ha ha ow ow ha!

Anyway, John has propped the stuffed snake in the windowsill and the pigeons have been gone all morning. Doesn't he understand that he's robbing me of my cherished friends?!? I'm all aloooooooooooooooooooooooone and my pigeons are the only ones who will listen!

John told me last night he was worried I was bored. I said no. (What, the fact that I'm befriending pigeons is cause for alarm?) In all honesty, I've been keeping really busy just doing errands and getting ready for camping and getting stuff together in general. I told him to ask me again in two weeks. :-)   But as of right now, I'm loving the pace.

Today's agenda includes heading back up to the VA to have lunch with John and James (the other Fellow working with John), and then I take the car back here so I can head to The Castro for a hair appointment. Part of me kinda wanted to attempt the bus transfer today, but since I have a strict appointment time, I'm figuring I should save this next step for when my arrival time to my destination isn't important.

One more thing: Please click this link and take this poll about my Bad Names List.

OK.. More later...